Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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