do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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