I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
