Is it normal to miss your booty call?
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
