I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
