am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
