we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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