physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
