We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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