normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
