that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
