My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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