I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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