It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Randomize
