Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
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I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
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A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
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