I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
