this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Randomize
