yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.