We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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