My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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