Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Randomize