3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
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