I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
