So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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