And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
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