So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
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