yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Randomize
