I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
