Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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