um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
