I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
