no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
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