I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
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