He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Randomize
