jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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