I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
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