Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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