it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
it's not cheating when I paid for it
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
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