You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
