No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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