You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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