Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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