She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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