Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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