Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
