hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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