Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Randomize