Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
P.S. I can't hear my feet
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
