he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
