this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
